In all fairness, not a lot was known or talked about when I was diagnosed with Epilepsy 45 years ago. But, I wonder how much of this has changed? Can you relate to the following?
“Do not talk about it!” they said. A variety of people told me this over the years.
“Oh, thank goodness you are getting married. Now there is someone to look after you!” This was said from a loving place.
“You are financially set for life, so do not worry about money!” No. That did not happen, nor did I expect it.
“Do not tell people you have epilepsy; it scares them.”
“What, you lost your job because you have epilepsy and could not come to work?”
“Do not tell the employer you have epilepsy; they will not hire you!”
“Nice girl, but she has epilepsy.”
“Epilepsy is satanic, you know.”
“You may not make it to 65 years old.”
This just made me stronger! The things people said to me left me with NO words at certain points in my life.
Do I have scares from seizures? You bet! Emotionally and physically.
Is there damage to my face and head? Yes. Are there noticeable signs on my face? Yes; you have to look hard to see it, but that makes me ME!
Were the financial costs huge?! YES, . . . some were covered. Out of pocket costs were extraordinary as I searched for answers, alternative solutions, and help to fix the huge impact on my body and health. Above 6 figures.
At some points, I could not work or drive. I had to take time off work. By the way, some employers were incredibly understanding and patient with me. Hudson’s Bay Company was one. They were so good to me!
Mental health was a struggle: depression, anxiety, and panic attacks… I think I did well at hiding it all.
Losing pregnancies hurt, too. Very few knew to what extent. “Keep things quiet,” right? I became brilliant at blocking emotions for the most part. There is always the exception, though.
When relationships ended, I was never shocked, but I will tell you, some really hurt. Did I sabotage them because I was damaged goods? Definitely. Did I really do that? Shame on me!
I am blessed that it is dormant, in remission, or hiding; that is for sure! Will it come back? Not if I can help it!
Are there a lot of positives in this journey? You bet! I am feeling very blessed, grateful, and thankful for them.
We all have a story, right?
they are all important!
I am a woman who lives without fear of epilepsy, or, I try! LET'S TALK ABOUT IT!
I was asked by someone about 4 years ago, "What was going on in your life when you got epilepsy?" What? I had no idea! I had a great job, I lived on my own, I had a car, I was going to school part-time. I was partying and having so much fun in life! I had been to college, I had traveled and studied in Europe. As I reflect back on that question I very recently became aware that around that time I was searching for my purpose, my direction, what I was meant to do in life. What was I here for? There was something more but what? What was I supposed to do with my life? I wasn’t too keen on doing all the traditional things.
Now, I am not saying getting epilepsy was an answer. The timing was interesting, however. But, I can l tell you that I have found my purpose and calling in this life and that is to provide resources to others with Epilepsy. My journey was not easy at all. If I can make someone else’s journey with Epilepsy a bit better that would be awesome!
I learned to take on the mindset of a victor, not a victim. Now that took a lot of work, let me tell you. I also thought, if they are telling me all the things I cant do, what about all the things I can do? I chose to build this business with the intention of helping others perhaps have an easier path forward than what I did.
If you are living with epilepsy and are on a journey to a better life, let's talk! Sign up for a discovery session with me to see if transformation coaching is for you!
I was thinking back over the years to the comments from those that I am sure meant the best, but that did not think I should or could or would do what I do now.
Yes, I put a lot of time and money in to this and I changed direction or got off course by a shiny object at times.
I have to say I also had some great support and encouragement from some fabulous people that were there with me and agreed that I was on the right path.
I had this feeling that kept me going when money was running out that I was working towards what perhaps was my purpose in life and I kept going and going and going.
Through all the changes, hesitations, money I spent on this, the doubt, the fear... I got here.
Thank goodness for my stubbornness, my faith and knowing that this is what I am meant to do.
As I think back on comments made to me such as:
Well, that is not a glamorous business.
Shouldn't you do something else.
No one wants to talk about Epilepsy.
Why did you pick this?
It is hard to start a biz.
Most don't succeed.
That just encouraged me more to go harder on this.
Well, I am doing this!
My hope is that it will help others on their own journey.
It does not matter what others think of me.
It is not about me.
It is not always about the money.
When I leave this planet when it is my time in perhaps 30, 40 or 50 years from now, my hope is that I was a great cheerleader, coach, support, resource, listener, and perhaps mentor for other Women with Epilepsy.
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When I look back at my 55th birthday, that is where it all started.
That birthday I felt lost and alone.
I had lost my partner, too many friends had left this world and my had mother died.
I had lost all my "rocks" in life.
I found myself living on my own, shut down.
I decided to say enough!
I set out to redefine myself and start again.
I signed up to an empowerment program which was the best decision I ever made.
The next 4 years were a blur, it was a lot of hard work and fighting depression.
Mind over matter, learn, grow, fight... fantastic things began to happen.
Years later I had my life back thanks to a lot of hard work and great mentors, friends and coaches that encouraged me to follow my purpose, my passion and perhaps the path I was meant for.
Where are you in your life path?
Fast forward 7 years today, here I am a Transformational Coach and I want to give you the same chance I took. Sign up for my Transformational Coaching for Women Over 50 today through 06/14.18 and you will get 4 30-minute sessions for $49.95, normally up to $149 per hour. Contact me today!
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